Did you know you, as a parent, have the ability to speak magic words which will spur your kids into a flurry of activity faster than a giant tube of Pixie Stix? Yep. Those words are:
"Be quiet for a minute. I just want to watch this."
The moment those words leave your mouth, you wish you could reel them back in. The children descend on you, flooding the room (if they weren't all there to begin with), asking asinine questions, arguing about ridiculous, petty things, dancing to tunes only they can hear...and it all happens in front of the television. It doesn't matter if all you wanted to do was watch a 30-second news clip, see your favorite part of a movie, or hear a portion of a song with the captions on so you can finally figure out the lyrics. It will now take you 10 minutes, at the very least, to accomplish that task.
|Actually, it comes in a lot of cute colors and patterns now.|
And, yet, we can't seem to keep ourselves from saying those magically devastating words. They tumble right out of our mouths, even as we try desperately to shove them back in. I can almost see the words flying through the air like a virus, injecting previously normal children with a jolt of obnoxiousness, immediately causing chaos.
So, I say, thank goodness for the digital age. I still get annoyed. I still have to tamp down my frustration over not being able to fulfill my desire immediately. And this is something that comes with being a mother. However, in this case, there is a savior. And that is the pause button. Oh, pause and rewind. How I love you. Even as I have to utilize you several times because despite how often this happens to me, I still have failed to wait until the virus has completely cleared the little monsters' systems before trying to watch that one little thing. But, finally, the children see the determined glare in my eyes, they hear that last thread of patience in my voice and know I am about to snap, and they wisely disperse. I press play and I am happy.
Until the next time I say those magically horrible words.